What a year 2008 was. First on June 13th a Friday Dr. Marci L. Bowers called and asked if I would like to come to Trinidad, Colorado early for my Reassignment Surgery. She told me a opening had became available for July 31st. I sat but could not speak. With tears streaming down my face I told her YES. After so many long years of hoping and dreaming my date had moved in five months. She asked if I was okay and I said I had never been better. Little did I know it would be so much more. On July 29th Cami and I flew to Colorado Springs and after renting a car drove the 127 miles south to Trinidad.

On July 31st at about 12 noon I was walked into the OR and the last thing I remembered was Dr. Marci Bowers telling me everything would be fine and my right arm being strapped down. Things went beautiful. My surgery was a little over 3.5 hours long and in recovery the people around me and where I was once again began to focused into reality and all I wanted was to see my dear Cami. As I was wheeled to my room where she was waiting for me the full reality of what had taken place began to slowly set in. In my room as the fog of anesthesia completely lifted I was so excited and happy beyond my dreams. Surgery was complete, I was conscious and my love was there holding my hand.

I felt so at peace within myself. After so many years of feeling incomplete I finally felt I was whole at last. It is something I really cannot explain it very well with words but my Cami said she could see it in my eyes and expressions. Dr. Bowers during her post surgical visit said things went wonderfully well and I would be really pleased with the results, but I was already pleased and beyond happiness, I was ecstatic. The rest of that day was one filled with moments of emotional crying and extreme giddiness. Several times all I could do in my still somewhat groggy mind was bounce and shake. I really could not believe what I had wanted so long for was at last no longer a dream I experienced so often in both my conscious and sleeping state. I had once again visited that magical kingdom in my mind and once again the queen of my dreams made me her princess but this time when I woke, I still was a princess with the body of a princess, complete and whole.

On the third day my dressing was removed and using a mirror I saw myself for the first time, I cried for almost an hour. Later I was allowed out of bed and walked for the first time. I was able to shower and after as I stood in front of the mirror I saw in my reflection what I had seen many times before but always watched as that vision faded away into reality. This time what I had always seen did not fade away, it was reality. I may have been swollen and bruised but I was beautiful.

I spent a week in the hospital and two weeks recovering in Trinidad, a place I will forever consider Home.

In October Cami and I drove to Massachusetts to visit Plymouth. While there we visited Provincetown and on October 14th on the shores of Cape Cod Bay Cami and I were married as wife and wife, forever in Love. Below is our vowes.

Michelle Alison McKay and Cameron Marie Hodges
October 14, 2008
On 13 Mermaid Avenue, Provincetown

Michelle and Cameron today is the day that you have chosen to enter into marriage. Now the two of you come before me to honor your love and your commitment to each other, as you exchange vows of marriage.

Marriage is a relationship entered into thoughtfully, reverently, with gratitude for the past and hope for the future. In the words of Rainer Maria Rilke, from Letters to a Young Poet:

It is … good to love: because love is difficult. …For one human being to love another human being: that is perhaps the most difficult task that has been entrusted to us, the ultimate task, the final test and proof, the work for which all other work is merely preparation…

There is a tradition of beginning a wedding ceremony with some words about marriage. I would like to share the words of Chief Justice Margaret Marshall of the Massachusetts Supreme Judicial Court...from the Goodridge decision, which established marriage equality:

Civil marriage is at once a deeply personal commitment to another human being and a …celebration of the ideals of mutuality, companionship, intimacy, fidelity, and family. Because it fulfills yearnings for security, safe haven, and connection that express our common humanity, civil marriage is an esteemed institution, and the decision whether and whom to marry is among life's momentous acts of self-definition.

Cameron and Michelle, you have come here today to seal your love and to confirm your loving commitment to one another. You have made a choice to be together in life, in marriage. Now I will ask you to confirm your solemn intentions.

Michelle and Cameron, do you promise to love and honor each other in marriage?

In laughter and in tears? In health and in illness? In success and in failure? Both as partners and as equals?

Cameron and Michelle, since it is your intention to enter into marriage, in love and trust, please join your hands and your hearts to pledge your vows of marriage.

We begin with Michelle, please repeat after me:
Michelle:
I take you, Cameron to be my wife
I will love you and care for you. I will respect you and your feelings. I will stand by you as your wife through difficult and happy times. And I promise to nurture the love that we share.

And now Cameron:
I take you, Michelle to be my wife
I will love you and care for you. I will respect you and your feelings. I will stand by you as your wife through difficult and happy times. And I promise to nurture the love that we share.

Throughout the world, rings are recognized as symbols of loving commitment. Because the circle has no beginning or end, rings speak of everlasting love. Michelle and Cameron your rings are tokens of your commitment and symbols of the life you share together.

Cameron, as you place this ring on Michelle’s finger, please repeat after me:
Michelle, I give you this ring as a symbol of our commitment; please wear it with love and joy

And now Michelle…
Cameron, I give you this ring as a symbol of our commitment; please wear it with love and joy

Cameron and Michelle may your love deepen and grow as the years go by. May you gladly share your joys with one another, and may you always find comfort in each other’s arms.

Michelle and Cameron, you have chosen each other from the many persons on this earth. Today you stood before me and exchanged vows of marriage, and you gave and received rings symbolizing your commitment to each other. Therefore, by the power vested in me by the Commonwealth of Massachusetts, but most especially by the power of your own love, I pronounce that you are now married. (KISS)

It was a wonderful year. I love you my wonderful and sweet wife, Cameron Alison McKay

Michelle Marie McKay